It'd be nice to read something pleasant for a change . . .

Wouldn't you agree? Well, no worries; here, you don't have to worry about the problems of the world or the biases of a particular individual. The sentiments shared here are intended to appease to the majority of individuals - to please and be an enjoyable experience. If you are upset by something shared, feel free to comment and express, else your voice be unheard - and that is something we do not want happening!

Love you. <3

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

now my body ~ F E E L S ; (( moving )) through OCEANS .


Sometimes you don't know where things begin, and sometimes you're completely unaware of where they're going to end. Sometimes you lose track of time, sometimes you track time so precisely that you lose track of detail. Sometimes detail's so overwhelming that you never think anything's changed, that anything's the same.

Sometimes, just sometimes, you can feel... out.

Sometimes loneliness is okay.

Sometimes loneliness hurts.

Sometimes your body tells you secrets, and sometimes you tell secrets to your body. Sometimes those secrets hurt. Sometimes they heal.

Sometimes the world around is too much; sometimes it's exactly what you need.

Sometimes the ambiguity of a stranger leads you down both paths which reach the same destination.

Sometimes you learn things that strengthen you. Sometimes you learn things that weaken other people.

Sometimes you are put in a position of compromising. Sometimes you are put in a position of moral challenge.

Sometimes your feelings are wrenched; sometimes they are wrung lifeless, barren, frugal. 

Sometimes you become so feeble, your mind becomes its sharpest.

Sometimes, when Life kicks your face to the dirt, you find that missing component to the equation that you could never solve when you were too busy looking in the clouds for it.

Sometimes, just sometimes, you figure that things couldn't get any worse.

Sometimes, when they do, you forget that you wake up every morning.

Sometimes those new mornings are new beginnings.

Sometimes it leaves your body like a breath. Sometimes it weighs down like water in your lungs. Sometimes it crushes your head like a wave. Sometimes it settles like Death.

Sometimes depth of everything is misconceived for depth of nothingness.

Sometimes nothingness is more than everything.

Sometimes nothing leads to nowhere, and sometimes everything leads to nowhere.

Sometimes everything leads to where you need to be, and sometimes nothing leads to where you need to be.

Some times will come and go. Some times will be held in memories. Some times will never come because you're expecting them. Some times will never tell you when they're happening.

Some times will show you that sometimes you may not know where they lead, but they get you where you need to be.

<3 ~ Monty.
=]

Monday, June 3, 2013

T o (( the recent GRADUATE ;

I've got a present for you all, even if you didn't graduate. First of all, congrats. Whether it's graduating from middle school, high school, undergraduate, or graduate school, congradulations. You've made it this far and now you've got miles and miles before you to pace yourself and make your impact on this world.

I've got a friend who did this speech thing at her school. She's quite the character, and you can tell it by her speech. She gave me permission to mention it, and though it's no blog-day entry, it's still important to share.

Reminds me of when I graduated. Oh man.

Fantastic job, Ink. I'm honored to know such an intelligent, wise, and awesome individual. Keep true to yourself and continue to share the knowledge you possess with everyone around you. I am grateful you share it with me.

Clara Lepard - "Do What You Love"
East Lansing High School

<3 ~ Monty.
=]

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

Let's go out and face it, looking like - D I S G R A C E S .





RainyMood

It's baaaack~!

RainyMood makes all of my music so much better. Go to sleep listening to it when media players decide to crop me of my privileges after a bit of inactivity, mayhaps. It's a beautiful thing.

What's going on guys? Sorry I've been so sporadic. I feel like I apologize a lot, and then promise you guys just as many entries as I'd love to make, but things happen, and things get in the way.

I'm presently just hammering this out because I needed to before I ran out for a bit.

It's been raining today. It rained the day before yesterday too, right? But yesterday was a friend's birthday, and we celebrated it thoroughly with a trip to the beach!

Happy 21st, Igor! Thanks for coming, Cami and Milika! Love you guys. =]

So that was fun.

Did today seem relatively rocky to anyone else? I don't know what it was, but I had to wake up earlier than I normally do out of the week, and then I was just in a cramped headspace all day. Let's see what the horoscope for today says.

...

What?

Capricorn (12/22 to 1/19)
Alias: The Seagoat

Today: Tuesday, May 28, 2013
"You are feeling quite passionate about a cause or a belief, but if you choose to broadcast your views then you are opening yourself to spar with other who have opposing opinions. If that's okay with you, Capricorn, then go ahead and say what you have to say. But if you would prefer to have a more peaceful an harmonious day, then remain quiet and tolerant. While you probably suspect that a certain person will disagree with you, and you would like the opportunity to debate the topic, you will have more of an impact if you say very little."

Oh. I didn't read the last line.

Hmm. Interesting.

Have you guys ever read your horoscopes? I mean, I used to just read them and think that they were too generic, but it's like an unofficial handbook for life. It's not like we get any other ones when we come from the womb, so an open mind to these things would normally keep us engaged and on some sort of track. You can always, simply enough, agree or disagree. I've met a lot of people who believe in different things, and horoscopes is the more of the miniscule in terms of impact.

And I could go into a whole spiel over the stars and how magnificently wondrous and mysterious and enticing they are, but there's another time for that: when I'm not rushing and trying to keep my feet rooted, y'know?

I don't know what's been going on, but this summer's just started... raw.

Maybe I need to visit my family and friends whom I haven't seen yet.

Plus I have a new nephew to go meet, so that's another thing on the list. Albeit, one of the enjoyable parts of being a Capricorn, I suppose.

So, I wanted to talk about a few things, and this I didn't really get permission to talk about, but she did request that I talk about her in the next entry, so I did.

For those of you who are unaware, I have a great friend who I met during the school year and grew really close with. Milika Cherée, I believe I've mentioned her before. For those of you who don't know her, check her out: she's musically talented, beautiful, intelligent, intuitive, and an all-around grand person.

Most of the Cancers I know tend to be.

If you are familiar with zodiacs, astrology and all that nice stuff, you would be familiar with the notion that Capricorns and Cancers aren't usually supposed to make great friendships. Same thing with Capricorn and Scorpios, but that's another story [ love my sister, Nicole Pastore - check out the link in the book image at the top if you don't know her ]. Anyhow, Milika and I have grown to be like brother and sister, mostly because of the few things we're involved in together [ like 'Til Further Notes (TFN) ] and all the time we spend together. I appreciate her friendship and should most certainly learn how to cherish human beings more than I do already. And, naturally, find a way to express this other than the writings of my mind that I rarely feel comfortable voicing openly.

Cancers' motif is the crab. The crab has a hard exoskeleton, but roll it over onto the back and not only is it immobile, but it is vulnerable. They are really emotional people, and I've learned that they're usually my source of empathy, guiding my practical and goal-oriented mind to share some sort of pleasure and compassion with my aspirations. For those of you who are familiar with my best buds Alex Quow and Erik Garnes, are Cancers as well. Wow, I have a lot more Cancer pals than I thought I did. Funny that.

We were driving back from the beach yesterday, and normally when Milika and I are together in a car, we get to talking. Talking about anything and everything. Usually things that we wouldn't put off for another moment, and the conversation's open and elaborate and wholly engaging; another reason why I appreciate Milika as much as she hopes I do. She's always there when you need to talk, and while someone may have an affliction or something that Milika does not feel comfortable with or about, she is accommodating and polite, as her mother has rightfully done in raising her.

Listen to me, I sound like I'm raving about her.

Sorry.

We were just talking. About the friends and family we knew. And it was a nice conversation. We talked about the "precursor" relationship, our Mama and Papa from TFN and how friends of ours would or would not match the level of genuine realness that they embodied in their relationship. Just about everyone in our acapella group adores them, no matter what happens in which way or that, and it's something about them that always graces our presence.

Maybe it's because they're destined for greatness with each other and in their own paths.

Then came self-conscience, barging in. It usually crippled our conversations if only for a moment, leaving us to wonder in a bit of silence, but she asked her question in a tone that was rather detectable. Obviously, she wasn't trying to hide anything and it made everything smoother. Once she expressed her thoughts, it got me to thinking.

How people do things for others selflessly. How I'd give up everything and anything for any individual, ranging from random stranger to one of my closest friends or relatives. It was just a nice reminder to know that wholeness still existed in this world.

In this world where people argue and debate over one another and their rights, where people slaughter and beat figuratively and literally - this place where we dwell on the bad much more often than we celebrate the good.

I don't know a lot of things. People come to me for wisdom, yet my wisdom teeth have yet to fully grow in. I'll let you know when they do, I suppose, but I just find that things come to me within the range of common sense. But what is the actuality of common sense? Some people are raised to discover these objective truths, rather than being taught them from their youth.

Like being nice to a stranger can have the same consequences as being mean to a stranger; you might see them again later that day - twice, even. You don't need to make a friend from it, but love is just as infectious as hatred is.

While I'm no stranger to being human, it's easier said than done. Of course. Yet, sometimes when I have a split-second to myself, none of my acclaimed wisdom that you guys come here and eat up sprouts from me. I guess it's part of my being a "situated" person: I need to be in the right element, the right mindset and setting, in order for things to function.

While a seagoat only has two hooves, they're to be rooted firmly.

How does a Seagoat even scale mountains. That's, like, an automatic handicap.

Totally unfair.

Haha.

Alright, I think I'm going to leave it at this: just sitting and thinking, hypothesizing, leaves a bunch of remnants on the inside of your mind. "What could be...?" and "What if...?" We all have lives of our own to live, but there's always going to be a community; with each growing second, technology does bring us further apart while bringing us closer. A happy medium's always optimal, but you find me on here more often than you see me speaking with strangers in the street.

So maybe that's what I'll start doing. I'll dedicate weekends out of the month figuring out how to make my way to community service for the summer. And work and take summer classes.

"If it's important, you'll make time."
- Jamyn of "Live, Love & Be Fit" Blogspot.

Hope you all had a lovely Memorial Day Weekend to those who observe. Thanks to the soldiers all around the world who keep everything in check, risking their lives and dedicating their time, effort, and focus doing something I could never bring myself to do. You deserve so much more than so many lines of my miniscule thanks, but there aren't words I could use to even convey pride, honor and such inspiration. Even for a moment.

<3 ~ Monty.
=]

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

`` but it`s somethin` here ; ~

 


I've been on my feet and I've been laid out flat. I've found the nooks and crannies where my hands and feet fit to climb the face of a mountain, and I've found where my slips and mistakes almost led to my demise. I've been in and out of focus, I've been in and out of reason, I've been in my own element and out of the realm of sanctity I once created for myself.

I could say that I would never change in less than a year, but I've found a lot, discovered many things - both in myself and in the world around me - that helps me appreciate everything in life and find a place in my mind where the connection can be... succinct, if you will.


I've met a lot of people. They've been blessings, lessons and everything in between. 2013 so far has been turbulent, as I should have expected, but no goal worth achieving is ever simple - there are always protrusions on the face of a mountain.

I'm back home. And for the summer, my goal is to stay just as busy and involved as I was during the summer, only to compensate for what I couldn't do and what I lost. I come home, a familiar warmth and space filled with nothing but comfort, with belongings to clutter it all and memorabilia of my ups and downs of my first year of university.

Not everyone is represented, but, easily enough, everyone is included.

Some things remain the same: the individual relationships, friendships, first impressions, lasting images, shared smiles and conflicting moments all hold their space in my crowded heart.

I've witnessed many things. I've endured many hardships. I've had the leniencies that others weren't so fortunate to possess.

And through the many people I've met, each one held a different talent.

tal·ent

[tal-uh nt] noun
1. a special natural ability or aptitude: a talent for drawing.
2. a capacity for achievement or success; ability.

One could make everyone in the room smile just by being present; another could determine which person was genuine and which individual they did not desire to be involved with; another could draw in the attention of drama and resolve it frankly; another could merely be honest; another could sing; another could laugh and infect people with their laughter; another could cry and heal their own wounds with wholesome vivacity.

Many of them I could befriend and learn from them, connecting the talents, introducing the individuals to people who were in the same realm of existence as them. Hopefully, I had something they each could learn as I had learned from each and every one of them.

The messages in life came pouring from select few, however. Whether it was in times of romance, in times of rampart rage, in times of rogue ransom, or even righteous wronging, I had never learned so much through living on my own and having to deal with a microcosm of the world as I did without the armor of my laptop to guard my ribcage and helm my mind.

"For I am an old soul
In a dying world
And we all need saving."
- Tarah-Lynn Saint-Elien, "Craved Disaster"

"Today's just been one of those days when I hate every single thing about my body."
- Tarah-Lynn Saint-Elien, "Lessons"

"Your dependence on people's opinions will send you to rehab.
In your blood, shoot up what Beauty's supposed to look like."

- Tarah-Lynn Saint-Elien, "Lessons"

"He said, 'You are Beautifully [ Fearfully ] and Wonderfully made' ( Psalm 139:14 NIV )."
- Tarah-Lynn Saint-Elien, "Lessons"

"More than a conqueror, so she views every day with a fresh face."
- Tarah-Lynn Saint-Elien, "Her Story is Mine"


Another I met was able to hear what the mind saw and relay what the heart felt.

Just like poetry needs a good read over a handful of times, these videos took me about a total of eleven watches to catch certain lines in each one of them. There's always something new in it to piece together, and with the wonder of knowing artistic talents go hand in hand with regular talents, exhibits like these are nothing less than noteworthy.

Go and check out the rest of Tarah-Lynn's other videos and let her know what you think.

Tarah-Lynn Saint-Elien

It's a name that was destined to be something big.

Albeit that doesn't seem to be her intent, it's something innate within her.

It's a wonder what people can create. Wonderful human beings who are capable of doing both good and evil yet choose one path over the other.

Thankfully, I've seen that the transition to either path is malleable and just as substantial as the paths themselves.

And though Tarah-Lynn may see the horror in this world and acknowledge it for what it is, I'm certain she can just as easily acknowledge the good that burrows itself and blossoms feverishly with the upcoming generations.

One day, Tarah-Lynn, your poetry will reach the ears and eyes of those who share your ideals and morals and the message will pulse as it does the very blood in our veins.

For it has passed through another vessel this very day.

<3 ~ Monty.
=]

Friday, April 19, 2013

i'm writing the FUTURE - i'm WRITING IT OUT loud ]


New Paramore Album! A little late on the announcements, but it's okay, one of my awesome brothers got it for me, and I've been absolutely infatuated with it. Whenever I haven't had time to do anything, I'd end up passing out to it on my bed, and it almost always ends before I wake up.

I tried to set it so that it'd loop, but sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't.

Day of Silence

April 19. It's a simple and trivial thing to do in certain perspectives, but to me, at least, it's a personal reminder of the changes that I aim to make in the world. Not specifically ending any matters of bullying or contending the suicides that spurn from these incidents and what have you, because I have a bigger checklist than just those notions, but it's a reminder, nonetheless.

To be a better person to all of the people around me, if not for myself, then for them.

There's always one person you see during each day of your life who needs some cheering up for whatever reason it is.

I know a handful of people who I see almost every day who rightfully and righteously retain this attribute of easy-going, complacent and genial personality. And, as I always say, I learn something from just about every individual I ever encounter in my life.

I half-observed the cause, starting officially after I was reminded from the attire of another individual observing it. Albeit, I didn't speak much during the day anyhow, it pieced together through the latter of the day. And observing the cause was never about bragging rights or for any particular reason other than to observe it.

Like people who are in love observe Valentine's Day, or people who are alive celebrate for the New Year.

Simple, right?

So, my friends and I have been through hell and back. The school year for my first year in University is coming to a close, and I'm in Tech Crew for the last musical of the season; meaning I'm one of the people who are backstage moving set pieces and what have you. It's my first time doing this, too, so it's very... on-your-feet. Though, it is tedious and strenuous, there are the people on headsets who are always on edge, always attempting to reign in the people they're divided to in order to have the show run smoothly.

Thankfully, they're more experienced than I am, so all of their confidence is outweighing my trepidation of making mistakes. Plus, after a while, there's a swing to fall into.

The environment of the musical's a bit awry to me: these are people who I, to say the least, am amazed by. Every single one of them, whether I'm close with them or not, because when they're on that stage, they capture even more attention than when they do off of it. And the director and those at his immediate flank are like a furious machine that powers at the head of this project.

I see it looking pretty awesome in the future.

What else?

You guys know how I make music and stuff like that, right?

Well, there's this friend I have, we've gotten really close in the less-than-year-span I've known her. She's an amazing person and we sat down the other day and just cranked out a song. Of course, it was rough, and we panned through it to fix the patches, but it's gorgeous. And then she helped me rekindle my drive for songwriting; finding melodies, altering moods and going outside of my comfort zone with certain songs.

Miss Milika Cherée, you are something else. I'm honored to know such talented people, you being included with the nameless others.

I wanted to do a bit of freelance writing for today, but I felt a bit of a cordial briefing on my life, for those who visit regularly and were missing this or whatever, might have appreciated.

Gonna wait for the song to replay. It's at the intense part, which, if you weren't expecting from the initial mellow drive, I wasn't either. Just because Paramore's new album is more of a different sound for them. But, like always, always loving them and learning every word to every song.

It's a little hard when you're not speaking during the day, though.


-


Pebbles and dust. Sandals separate the flesh, callous or soft is indeterminable, but the sandals separate the flesh.
The flesh is full and vibrant - alive.
A thread dangles, its tip gracefully lapping at the few pebbles that are kicked up from the tail of the sandal, each step stirring the gravel underneath further.

The scent of cold.
With it comes the sight of gravity: a leaf cascades from the graying skies, the conclusive shades upon the undersides of the clouds making them more friendly than ominous - making them more oppressed than oppressive.
Through these senses, the mind can hear.

Each step grows louder and louder. Each step soon is coupled by a breath, littering the scent of the cold with the concussive explosions of respiration - in and out. In and out.
From the sky, the head of brown hair, the head of black hair, the head of red hair, the head of blond hair, and the head with no hair all are angled downward.

First comes the black to stray from the path. To the right it veers, grass blades soon succumbing to the weight of a body and giving way to the rhythmic patting of the sandals.

Immediately after, the brown and red stop sharply. Brown turns after the black, though the red remains in place. 

The hairless head is stuck to wait after the head of blond hair, which is stuck to wait behind the head of red hair.

"Their eyes are closed. Their lips are sealed.

Their hearts are bound, sunken truths revealed." 

It is voiced by the whispers of the leaves as they are bent to the whim of the trees; of the pebbles as they are forced to grit against one another; of the threads of hair as they are buffeted by the wind; of the jumping of the flesh in spots where the pulse is noteworthy.

Most certainly, this song they have thought, in chorus, is voiced by the very beating of their hearts and the trains of their minds.

For now, the red, blond and hairless sway from side to side as does our innate orientation of balance.

Back comes the brown, with black in tow. They do not touch each other, nor have they pried open their eyes once. Back into place they shift, and once the last foot has settled, they breathe concurrently, lifting their left foot first.

The head of brown hair weaves opposite in the pattern, stepping forth on the right.

As it once had when it first strayed from the line.

A cough erupts from the rear of the line.

To the left steps the red and to the right steps the blond. The brown and black halt. Only the hairless takes four steps forth, passing through the passage created by the red and blond, only to reconvene the movement.

Forth brown. Forth black. Forth bald. Rejoins red and blond, stepping back into line, their foots syncopating with the rest of the chorus.

Eventually, they tire of their seemingly idle sojourn, slowing in pace, but the only true, constant happenstance is the cough that erupts from the lungs of the hairless head.

Once they've come to a speed that puts the hairless head at a disproportionate distance to the head of brown hair before it, the group rears forward in a halt.

Their faces turn skyward, two heads of hair rolling over their round, naked shoulders and revealing their vulnerable countenances.

The first drop of rain hits the red-head's face, garnering a flinch.

A smile slowly creeps through the muscles.

It's tacit and contagious - unseen, but injected into the atmosphere: it's a feeling that goes unspoken.

The hiss of light downpour whispers against the wind.

And smiles beam from the rest of their faces.

<3 ~ Monty.
=]

Tuesday, March 26, 2013







Sometimes I try to stay away from whatever it is that makes the world cringe - whatever it is that takes away from the smiles and the laughter that we share, from the moments of honesty and joy that maintain our existence, our oh so very dreadfully pleasurable existences on this planet. Without tainting anything, without leaving an imprint or impression, it'd be impossible to make sure I would have completed any particular missions I would have put out for myself.

Thing is, there are just some things that are bigger than any of us.

There are so many things wrong in this world, so many things that need our dire attention, our dire focus that we would most likely rediscover our morals. But, truth is, and not to sound aggressive here or anything, but I don't think we're ready for anything that's outside of the box.

There's been a generational trend apparently: what's old to the prior generation becomes obsolete; what's new to present generation becomes old; what's obsolete to the next generation becomes new. It's less of a cycle, but it has elements of "history repeats itself." And, naturally, I have no concrete evidence to present to you, as if that would make the world of a difference - the point is that we all should be able to understand, to comprehend what it is we need to do, the next step in order for us to actually become ready.

Ignorance is just another form of disinterest. Hatred is another form of disinterest. Rejection is disinterest. Conspiracies reside within the minds of paranoia's nests and objections rely on arguments to become substantial.

We don't need to interfere with anything that's already on its progression. Or its transgression, if that's how you see the glass.

There are countries that have no rights, there are countries where families are dismembered from birth; even where there is freedom, veils are cast and bars are bolted to ensure "the people are cared for and safe." What's interesting is that we're all more than capable of holding our own, of being intelligent enough to watch out for one another.

Somehow, a nation in Europe is free of Student Debt; somehow, an entire country in North America is so scotch-free, so blissful that it stands its residencies with doors unlocked; somehow, there are states, provinces that hold gun-control regulations and the crime rates vary just as well as they would anywhere else in the world.

Somehow, all around the world, people fall in love.

It's not our choice of who we love. As in actual love and spend the rest of our lives with, willingly or unwillingly. We are not given our parents, we are not given our backgrounds - all the greater choices in our lives seem to be exactly that: choices. However, there are only so many variables we can dance along our way upon our path. Each individual on this planet has their purpose, and no matter how far they stray or how clouded their minds may get, the purpose still stands.

And if they do not solve it in their time allotted, another may come in their place.

The extinction of man isn't looking to happen any time soon. We have the tools to do it at our very own disposal. Forget about all of the bombs and bullets and weapons and violence out there in the world.

The single-most dangerous weapon known to mankind is the mind.

With the intent comes the method and procedure and focus.

If hatred is hosted, it will breed and further blossom, spreading out as far as it knows how.

If love is hosted, it will breed and further blossom, spreading out as far as it knows how.

I bless not only the people I know who read this regularly, but the people I don't know, the people I know who never read this, and the people who may have thoughts like my own or even the individuals who will stumble upon this so long as it lays present. I never have willingly and wholly instructed an individual to commit an act - or even from my own act - against anyone else that would permanently inflict them, intentionally or unintentionally.

If the world stays round and keeps spinning, we'll have another day gone and done. And if we worry about what we're supposed to stay true to, we'll make it in this world alright.

There is a rarity of people who don't listen to music. There is a rarity of people who do not interact with other people. There is a rarity of people who are incapable of actually opening their minds and stepping back to see the bigger picture.

Of seeing that the world around them is bigger than just them or one single idea.

That it's always ever been bigger than both you and me.

And that it'll always be that way.

Love is love.

Who you love has always been your own personal business, and whether you act on that love or not is far beyond anyone else's control. If you live in a place where there are regulations, it's only a matter of time before other people agree with you or disagree with you and their ideas form into something formidable: a voice.

What did it matter when education became important to everyone in order for people to become one? For the very same immigrants who landed in America to humble the plane of existence and permit the other immigrants whom they'd invited to do free labor for them or even the immigrants who'd come in, looking for a new life as they once had themselves. And even the very immigrants who had been here before anyone else had record of.

When did it matter who loved who and what kind of consequences came from that?

If it's wrong, the only way people will learn is by their own mistakes.

If it's right, then there's more than one solution to get "x" is all.

I'm not saying people should all but drop what they're doing and focus in and then clang their sword and shield and go to war. I've never advocated anything but level-head thinking, an open mind, an open heart, and a clear eye.

You've known me, whether you were aware of it or not. And I've learned something - if not an iota of knowledge then a miniscule measure of experience - from every single individual whom I've encountered. And if you haven't liked me as a person or friend or what have you, then that is something I do not need to work on nor is it something that you need to concern yourself with. Sometimes people don't fit well: there are so many pieces to the puzzle and not every piece can go everywhere.

But for the lucky batch, for the many people who I am honored to recall smiles and laughter with, once or many a time, I have given you no reason to hate me.

And if you do not hate me, you should not hate who I love, no matter their race, background, future, nor present. You cannot hate a person or thing you do not know. And if you hate love, then you hate the very thing that may as well have brought you into this world.

Lust, adoption, surrogate, or natural procreation - it's all the same. There is love in the nurturing and upbringing of a child. If not, then the child is unconditioned to survive and the withdrawal of compassion molds nothing but an empty shell with an unlit wick.

It's only a matter of time before there is a flame that enters. Soon thereafter, the wick will become alight with passion.

I know I talk in circles; I know I try to cover so much in so many words, but the bottom line is that no matter who you are or who you come from, if you plan on making it in this world, you're going to need a friend or two. And whetheryou know it or not, you've had friends in the past who have been heterosexual, homosexual, or anywhere in between. And it's nothing but your business to handle your own business.

But if you're to discriminate against those with a particular color of flesh or a certain set in mind then you might as well discriminate against those with flesh or those with a mind, for it is purely asinine for man to eat is own hand as it is to shove his own hand down another's mouth.

It's easier said than done - to love without hating, but if you just worry about yourself and never give anyone a reason to hurt you, lay all your cards on the table and wear them proudly, your time will come when you gain your medal and you can turn back to help the next person.

And trust me, that side of the reward will be much more satisfactory and healthy for all of us.

I hope you guys stay safe and sensible as always. There have been close calls in my life and I've lost a few hopes and gained a few more along the way, but there's always one thing I've known to be true:


If I'm to be true to you, I must be true to myself. In order to do that, I must do what I know best:
Love.

<3 ~ Monty.
=]

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

let [ N O T H I N G ] - come BEFOREYOU; && forever seek what is true to you .

Song :: Halcyon - "Justly Effervescent" 

First thing's first:

Hi.

How are you today?

Be honest.

How was your day?

What'd you do today? Had school? How were classes? Something interesting happen?

Or, on the other hand, no classes today? Fortunate. Did you get the rest you deserve?

Well, if anything didn't go the way you wanted it today, chipper up; there's another after this one. Make that one better, yeah?

Good. Now that we've got that done and out of the way, what's next on the agenda?

Hmm.

I missed writing. =] I really did. I've been so busy, as you could tell. And I'm sure you all are just as busy as I.

I was in my first college production. I meant to get around to the entry for that, but, y'know. Spring Break happened. It's underway, though. It wasn't a large cast, so the intricacies of each and every individual helped me learn what I'm pursuing for the first time on a college stage. Principles and supporting roles and ensemble members were all amazing and it was an honor to work with each and every one of you.

Left to right: Danielle Grosso; Igor Correa; Michael Sebesto; Darin Earl; Roberto Forerro; Kelsey Carroll
"E-Crew" [ missing Mark & Diana ]
What else happened? ICCAs [ which the amazing acapella group I'm in - 'Til Further Notes placed 2nd in Quarter-Finals and advanced to Semi-Finals] were a while back. After the show I got sick, so I muddled about to classes and tried to stay on top of my stuff and scamper atop the stuff I wasn't already on top of.

So, I'm home on Spring Break... After everyone else has already had their break or prior to the few remaining. I'm just happy to be home, for the most part. As anyone else, I've got my reasons here and there, but every time I come home, it's a reminder of why I have to keep on keeping on.

"You see? I have no more time in my day to do anything. But it's okay: I'm doing what I want, and that gives me all the freedom in the world."
- Anetta B. [ Mom ]
I have a feeling that the important things I'm missing haven't all whizzed right by me. In this rush to understand my first year out of the house and adjust, even as it's coming near an end surprisingly fast, I've been equipped with a lot more than I'm aware of. And, for this, I am grateful, much like my mother is whenever she steps foot into the house.

I was reminded of this when I came back home after picking her up from work earlier tonight.

"`Thank you, Father.`

My mother is a dedicated and practicing believer, so she's been rooted in her spiritual faith and upbringing. It was like a siren through the calm night how right she was to be grateful for a home to sleep in. I cannot say that I do anything less in my mind - I am grateful for the people I've met, for the people I interact with every day, and for the things I can smile about. Even the things that aren't intended with the objective of making me smile demand a smile from me.
"
- January 31, 2012 [ "Adore" by Paramore ]

It's crazy to believe that I've had this thing for over a year. And I'm still writing, as sparsely as it is in these days. But it's okay. Because, so long as I'm alive and able, I have no reason not to.

I've discovered a few things about myself in the absence of writing. My outlets are strictly what they are because they're functional; not because I'm any degree of closed-minded, but it's what I know how to do, and I feel most comfortable in "my element," so to speak. Music has become a very ordinary thing while I'm at school, because I'm surrounded with people who make it second-nature to them, something that has been similar with me. And the complex of competition has never stuck well in my conscience, so as they flaunt and rehearse, I merely make my ends meet and do what I need to.

Something I should have learned long before: "Make the things that are ordinary to everyone else extraordinary to you." I thought about that when I was searching for something to make my hair look decent after waking up before leaving the house. Funny how some idle thoughts are the most important of your day.

So, I've been writing longer than I can remember; stories, poems, letters, lyrics - the works. Recently, I resolved to have an intervention with myself and put what's important to me first. And I've had so many friends who are capable of so many things help me out in so many ways, but there's only one person who'd to exactly what I need the way I needed it, no matter how lazy they got - and that was myself.

I sat down and cranked out songs to compensate for my long leave of absence from the musical world. I've gotten critiques, comments, compliments, take-aways and suggestions. If you feel you should find some surfacing as well, feel free to share them.

Three covers [ one video which hasn't been uploaded yet, but should be in the side bar at the top of this entry when it is there ] and an original song.

The original song was not entirely my work. A friend of mine who I've learned a lot from and still am gave me a prayer to say. I'll recite it for you guys.

I'm praying that your house would be free of the heavyness,
that our heart would rest in all that is good
and that, the breath of your brother, the snore of your mother,
and the gravity that is being
wouldn't overtake you -
but would inspire you.
That the heavyness that is the gift of your heart
wouldn't leave you empty,
but would leave you at rest
in the already not yet of it all.
And that hum,
the spirit,
the good / bad, happy / sad,
would hold you like a mother
and kiss you like a father
and make you know that you are good.
After all, those were the first words
spoken over your creation:
'Darin, it is good.'
And, finally, I pray that hope,
Hope... will carry you to the heights of beauty, love, and life,
Even in your sleepy dreams.
Now you, thing that is beautiful,
Say 'Amen.'

And then I made the song for this entry - Halcyon - "Justly Effervescent".

It's like my first official original song, and although my mixing skills are reallyy... mediocre, I think I did a pretty good job. Hopefully you enjoy it.

And the lyrics to that try to mirror the message of the prayer but also including a few personal interpretations. I showed my friend the song, and absolute favor rained down on it. And then I shared it with friends and family, and they were supportive. So I need more insight - maybe from people without bias, people with a background in recording to tell me what I should and shouldn't do for the next song I write. Granted, I may or not take it into account, and I always have Erik to be a concrete and reliable buddy who'll steer me right from wrong.

"Justly Effervescent"
I pray that you might see
All that you can be [ and all that is good ]
Let nothing come before you,
And forever seek what is true to you.

For great heights stand
On the shoulders of man who can
Find what they search for,
While all else they adore.

Conquer the odds,
This I pray, the gift of your heart
Sets free your gods to find your
Soul.

Within you lies good,
This I pray, the spirit of your heart
Sets you free as it should and give you
Peace.

We've lost without losing,
Feeling guided when it's confusing [ and the answer isn't clear. ]
Goodness to hold like a mother
And kiss like a father.

To win without winning
Shows the world's still spinning
Even after death,
"I will give you rest."

What lay on the path ahead?
Is it for me to know?
Or do I just stay,
Choose a way to go?
"Let what may come or go."

Conquer the world,
This I pray, true to your life
Embodies a new "me" to tell of
Love.

It has been said,
This I wish, the world as one
To come together, free all binds that
Hold us back

And live.


- Darin F. Earl, II :: 1 / 13 / 13

Yeah. That was a journey.

But hopefully you'll check out some of the other recordings on that there website; covers and the works. If you have any suggestions or requests, feel free to contact me. And I hope things go swimmingly for you all.

Here's to a swift and convenient rest of the semester and a pleasant lifetime. I should probably get around to reading for my core classes.

Thanks for reading, as always. Blessings and good vibes.

<3 ~ Monty.
=]